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FILM REVIEW: GOAT (PG) ESP RATING: 4/5
A visually dazzling, funny, and heartfelt sports romp. There’s something instantly comforting about a classic underdog story, and Goat leans into that idea from the very first whistle. This animated sports comedy follows Will, a small goat with very big ambitions – namely, becoming a professional player in the fast-paced sport of Roarball. When he’s unexpectedly given the opportunity to join a professional team made up of far larger, more physically imposing animals, Will qui

ESP Online
3 days ago2 min read


FILM REVIEW: STITCH HEAD (U) ESP RATING: 3.5/5
A gentle reminder that being different is something to celebrate. Every now and then, a family film comes along that feels like it’s been stitched together (pun absolutely intended) from classic gothic storytelling and a big, beating heart. Stitch Head, based on the much-loved books by successful children's author Guy Bass from Peterborough, is exactly that – a spooky-tinged animated adventure that delivers warmth, charm, and a thoughtful message without ever losing sight of

ESP Online
3 days ago2 min read


FILM REVIEW: SEND HELP (15) ESP RATING: 4/5
Every now and then, a thriller comes along that reminds you just how entertaining a simple, contained story can be when it’s in the right hands. Acclaimed director Sam Raimi (Evil Dead and Spider-Man) does just that by providing a tense, darkly-comic survival story that’s simply a fun watch from start to finish. The film centres on Linda Liddle (Rachel McAdams), a hardworking but overlooked corporate employee who finds herself stranded on a deserted island after a plane crash

ESP Online
Feb 142 min read


FILM REVIEW: PRIMATE (18) ESP RATING: 3.5/5
It has been an impressive start to the year for horror-related movies – and this is another effective genre flick from the director of 47 Metres Down. A tropical vacation for a group of teens goes awry when an intelligently-domesticated family chimpanzee (called Ben) is bitten by a rabid animal – and becomes insanely violent. This leaves the sister owners of the pet – Lucy (Johnny Sequoyah) and Erin (Gia Hunter) – and pals fighting for their lives as the monkey runs amok acro
Gavin Miller
Feb 122 min read


FILM REVIEW: IS THIS THING ON? (15) ESP RATING: 4/5
A stripped-back, vulnerable performance that shows a new side of Will Arnett. Some films pull you in with spectacle, while others quietly draw you closer without you quite realising how deeply invested you’ve become. Is This Thing On? very much falls into the latter category. I was absolutely captivated from start to finish – but despite my positive score, this is still a film I’d encourage people to approach with the right expectations. Loosely inspired by the real-life expe

ESP Online
Feb 53 min read


FILM REVIEW: MERCY (12A) ESP RATING: 3/5
Is the hate justified? There’s been a noticeable amount of negativity surrounding Mercy since its release. Is the movie genuinely as bad as the reactions suggest, or has it perhaps just arrived at the wrong time? Starring genuine Hollywood A-lister Chris Pratt (of Guardians of the Galaxy and Jurassic World fame), Mercy is a near-future sci-fi thriller set in a world where artificial intelligence has taken control of the justice system. Pratt plays a detective who suddenly fin

ESP Online
Feb 23 min read


FILM REVIEW: 28 YEARS LATER – THE BONE TEMPLE (18) ESP RATING: 4.5/5
Brutally unflinching – this is made for the fans. When I reviewed 28 Years Later last year, I gave it a respectable score… but it came with a strange sense of guilt. I felt like a defensive parent, desperately trying to justify a naughty child’s bad behaviour. I love this franchise, and while I praised the cinematography and the sheer guts it took to do something different, I knew something wasn’t quite right. Beneath all that admiration was a simple truth: audiences deserved

ESP Online
Jan 233 min read


FILM REVIEW: ANACONDA (12A) ESP RATING: 2.5/5
This action-comedy meta-reboot of the cult classic giant snake movie doesn’t quite go ‘all in’ with what it’s trying so hard to be. It throws a lot of ideas at the wall, but only some stick, and some slither off. This does have a handful of funny comedic moments – which you’d expect with Jack Black and Paul Rudd in the lead roles – but isn’t as clever as the idea is attempting to accomplish. Almost a bit Jumanji-ish in execution. A midlife crisis inspires frustrated ex-filmma
Gavin Miller
Jan 152 min read


FILM REVIEW: MARTY SUPREME (15) ESP RATING: 4.5/5
Ambition has rarely looked this frantic – or this exhausting – on screen. I almost made the same mistake with Marty Supreme that I once made with Whiplash. I remember thinking: ‘Why would I go and see a film about a drummer when I have no interest in drumming?’ That film completely floored me and now comfortably sits among my top films of all-time. So yes, I could very easily have looked at Marty Supreme and thought: ‘Why would I go and see a film centred around table tennis?

ESP Online
Jan 83 min read


FILM REVIEW: THE SPONGEBOB MOVIE – SEARCH FOR SQUAREPANTS (PG) ESP RATING: 3.5/5
You’ll have a whale of a time! From the opening moments, the latest SpongeBob movie instalment fully commits to ‘nonsense’ – dialling the randomness up to levels that somehow surpass the already ‘bonkers’ standards set by earlier films. This may well be the most ‘barmy’ entry yet, which is really saying something. The film loosely follows SpongeBob SquarePants (Tom Kenny) as he blunders into yet another absurd quest, joined by Patrick Star (Bill Fagerbakke), a perpetually irr

ESP Online
Dec 31, 20252 min read


FILM REVIEW: AVATAR – FIRE & ASH (12A) ESP RATING: 4/5
The third blockbuster foray into the Na’vi world of Pandora is undeniably more of the same. And whether you’re a fan of the previous two movies will literally dictate how much that is a good or bad thing. As a visual spectacle, once again, the special effects are absolutely top drawer from filmmaker James Cameron and company – arguably the best ever seen on the big screen. But, and it’s a BIG but. To the casual film-goer who maybe saw the second film because of a 13-year hiat
Gavin Miller
Dec 22, 20253 min read


FILM REVIEW: SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT (18) ESP RATING: 3/5
A festive flasher that never quite lets loose. This reimagining of the 1984 cult original still feels deliciously transgressive – and an obvious candidate for a modern remake – with Rohan Campbell (Halloween Ends) stepping into the blood-soaked boots of Billy Chapman. After witnessing his parents’ brutal murder at the hands of a man dressed as Santa, Billy grows up haunted by the trauma, eventually embracing the red suit himself as he sets out to punish those he deems naughty

ESP Online
Dec 22, 20252 min read


FILM REVIEW: FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY’S 2 (15) ESP RATING: 2/5
You could just pretty much ‘cut and paste’ my review of the first FNAF film – minus the initial thrill of seeing this video-gaming world unravel on the big screen. The same things that reared its head just over two years ago are still prevalent in this very lazy and underwhelmingly predictable sequel. Yep, for younger fans it’s nice to see the introduction of new characters from gaming lore, but bar that fan service, this is as basic as they come. Once again it falls into tha
Gavin Miller
Dec 11, 20253 min read


FILM REVIEW: ZOOTROPOLIS 2 (PG) ESP RATING: 4.5/5
This sequel to 2016’s Zootropolis has just reminded us how magical a trip to the movies can be. In a year where cinema has been crying out for a true family-friendly blockbuster with heart, humour and genuine craft, the latest Disney animation has bounced onto screens – with a genuine cinematic buzz. In what may go down as one of the toughest years for movies – both in quality and box-office takings (bar the recent Wicked: For Good of course) – this animated sequel is not on

ESP Online
Dec 4, 20253 min read


FILM REVIEW: WICKED – FOR GOOD (PG) ESP RATING: 3.5/5
After a meandering start, this second instalment of the musical juggernaut springs into life to provide a fitting finale to the two-parter. It ends up being just about the equal of the first film, even if the lack of memorable toe-tapping numbers seen last time round, have to be replaced with an emotional underbelly to pull it through its weaker moments. And it works. The last hour in particular is very enjoyable. And being 25 minutes shorter than its predecessor makes it
Gavin Miller
Nov 30, 20252 min read


FILM REVIEW: NOW YOU SEE ME – NOW YOU DON’T (12A) ESP RATING: 3/5
The Horsemen Juniors breathe new life into the magical franchise. After a nearly-decade hiatus the leading ‘Horseman’ J Daniel Atlas (Jesse Eisenberg) re-appears to enlist a trio of young illusionists – Charlie (Detective Pikachu’s Justice Smith), Bosco LeRoy (The Holdovers’ Dominic Sessa) and June (Borderlands’ Ariana Greenblatt) – after they stage a fake Four Horseman magic show, to mirror their traditions of exposing amoral activity. After Daniel receives a tarot card from
Gavin Miller
Nov 30, 20252 min read


FILM REVIEW: THE RUNNING MAN (15) ESP RATING: 3/5
Edgar Wright’s remake is action-packed – but surprisingly light on substance. As a lifelong fan of the British filmmaker – the sort who still quotes the Cornetto Trilogy (Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz and The World’s End) regularly – I was genuinely excited to see him take on Stephen King’s The Running Man. If ever there were a story suited to his flair for kinetic action and sharp humour, this seemed like it. Glen Powell steps in as Ben Richards, a desperate man flung into a d

ESP Online
Nov 27, 20252 min read


FILM REVIEW: CHRISTMAS KARMA (PG) ESP RATING: 2.5/5
As a film reviewer myself, I usually avoid reading other reviews before I see a film – I don’t like going in with someone else’s opinion rattling around my head. But with Christmas Karma, curiosity got the better of me. I had a little peek . . . and yikes. There have been some really scathing reviews! Normally, that would be enough to put me off, but my mum really wanted to see this – and you don’t cancel a Christmas cinema trip with your Mum. That would put anyone on Sant

ESP Online
Nov 24, 20252 min read


FILM REVIEW: PREDATOR – BADLANDS (12A) ESP RATING: 4/5
Despite potential fears that ‘dumbing down’ Predator from its more accustomed bloodier rating of ‘15’ to ‘12A’ would impact the series – it couldn’t be further from the truth. Director Dan Trachtenberg follows up his highly-acclaimed direct-to-streaming entry with the Native American-set Prey, to provide something just as spectacular – in a completely different way. This is without doubt looking to the future by giving the franchise a ‘broader’ appeal. And it works. In fact,
Gavin Miller
Nov 13, 20253 min read


FILM REVIEW: GABBY’S DOLLHOUSE – THE MOVIE (U)ESP RATING: 4/5
Pure joy for kids – and surprisingly delightful for adults too! When I asked Gav if I could review Gabby’s Dollhouse, he didn’t exactly put up much of a fight when allowing me to do so! As a middle-aged man, I’m certainly not the target demographic, but my seven-year-old son really wanted to watch it, and erm... we did. And I must be honest when I say that... I became fully immersed in the experience. The film stars Laila Lockhart Kraner, reprising her role as Gabby (as from

ESP Online
Nov 4, 20252 min read
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